I walked through the door, letting the screen slam behind me. Walking over to the fridge, I grabbed a package of string cheese from the top shelf and took off the wrapper. I flopped down on the couch and flipped on the TV. Jeopardy was all that was on. Suddenly, I walked into the room.

"How many times have I told you to take off your shoes at the back door?" I asked myself. "And for goodness' sake! Close the door behind you. We're not paying to heat the outdoors!" I sighed, inwardly and outwardly, and trudged over the back door to take my shoes off. I watched myself with growing impatience.

"I suppose you're just going to leave them there for me to pick up." I asked myself sarcastically.

I rolled my eyes. Dramatically, I shut the door and picked up my shoes and threw them down the hallway to my room. "Can I watch TV now? Please?"

"I don't like your attitude." Myself said to me. "I've been here all day getting the house cleaned up and cooking dinner, and you come home and act like you shouldn't have to do anything around here."

"Well" I said, rolling my eyes, "I haven't exactly been lounging around all day myself. All I want is to relax for a few minutes."

I glanced at my watch. "It's almost 7:30. I need help if I'm going to get dinner on the table. I need you to empty the dishwasher and peel some potatoes."

I sighed heavily. "Fiiiine." I shrugged my backpack off and went out to empty the dishwasher as I sat down at the table, looking over the checking account balance paperwork. "You know," I said to myself, "We could use some help with the groceries around here. You eat too, you know." I glanced over my shoulder. "We might have to raise your rent if you don't feel like helping for the food you eat." Ignoring myself, I emptied the dishwasher and got started peeling potatoes. The back door opened, and I walked through the door. I walked over and gave myself a kiss.

"How was your day at work?" I asked.

"Oooh, not too bad." I replied.

"I was just talking to myself about helping with the grocery finances. What do you think?"

"Oooh...I don't suppose it's a bad idea." I replied. "Do I have time to work out before dinner?"

"I suppose so. I was just having myself peel some potatoes while I balance the checkbook. Dinner will be ready about eight."

"Mmmkay." I walked off to go work out while I sat back down at the table to work on the checking account, while I peeled the potatoes myself.

Exit, stage left. Sparks